Attachment, a Childhood Necessity

Attachment – so important in human formation!  To fulfill that role as a parent what does it boil down to?  I’d like to provide two definitions both short and relatively simple to help you focus on the essentials of sound parenting.

James and Marion

From Todd Hall whose blog I regularly enjoy:  “An attachment figure is a person you look to for two things: 1) comfort and protection when you’re distressed, and 2) emotional accessibility to give you the confidence to explore the world and take risks. “

 

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Years ago from Dr. Dobson I learned that children need to know their parents as:  1)  Good and 2) strong (especially fathers).

ED pic

Keep in mind that attachment happens early in life.  One of my CK sisters has the shortest dad I know.  He was quite a contrast to my farmer father who wore 13EEE boots.  I was surprised to learn that as a child she saw him as a giant.  (You don’t have to be large in stature to seem big and strong to a little one.)

I would add that secure attachment can be even more secure when children grow up in an environment of faith.  Knowing our parents are people of faith ties them to God and who is more good or strong than God?  We refer to him as omnipotent, meaning all powerful, and the source of all goodness.  And He is truly that, GOOD, STRONG, along with beautiful and true and a host of other positive attributes.

The predictability of the practice of the faith is yet another way we provide security in our family.  Prayer before meals, prayer at bedtime, weekend Mass together all provide a context for secure attachment.  May the Lord enable you to build your family on a firm base in this constantly changing world, it is quite a tall order in today’s society, but God’s grace is there at each step, call upon it.  I try to often, and rely upon it quite heavily, join me there at the cradle of the King.

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